The "Easy" Way Out

So....I know it's super lame to make a list because I've been too lazy to write on a regular basis, but that's the way it is, so deal with it.... I have compiled a list of the top 10 things that we have done, experienced, seen, or had happen to us, since our last post:

1) We were fortunate to have an amazing Christmas gift from my dad from '07 - a gift card to the 5th Avenue Theater. With this gift we were able to buy tickets to see an incredible show: "Sunday in the Park with George" which is based on the life of George Seurat and on his famous painting: Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte. Scott loves Stephen Sondheim, so this was a rare treat for him. The visual effects were the most impressive I have seen... and we went away with much to consider on the nature of art and beauty; what is genius?; and the sacrifices we make to pursue our passions. Check out this amazing website:
Evening Magazine Video On Demand Seattle News, Local News, Breaking News, Weather KING5.com
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2) Sara found out that I am getting "let out" of my obligation to do FFT therapy - which, in my opinion, has no price tag on it. Instead, I will be transitioning to doing outpatient almost full-time (which I do half-time right now) as well as teaching the Diversion class, which is a class for kids who have been arrested on a Theft 3 charge (which is basically shoplifting). I haven't had a chance to teach the class on my own yet, but I have a lot of ideas about how to make this class "my own" and help kids to see that the best influence they have over their choices is their own influence.

3) Sara got called to teach Relief society in our ward.....that's right folks, I'm teaching AGAIN! I will NEVER escape it.....but that's okay, because I enjoy being with adults for a change. And I get to teach the modern day prophets' teachings: Teachings For Our Times.

4) Our faith was restored in the court system....Scott recently received a letter in the mail claiming he had failed to pay a speeding ticket fine and was in jeopardy of losing his license. The letter claimed he had received the ticket last April and had not acted on the requirements of the ticket, i.e., paying for it. Apparently, he had passed the time during which he could appear in court to protest the ticket, but after calling the court Scott was told that he could write a letter for a Stop Cause Hearing to have the ticket expunged from his record. While it was a long-shot, he received a response yesterday that explained his ticket had been entirely removed from his record. HOORAY!

5) Scott got an iPhone for his birthday (even thought it's not until June 11), and he is in hog-heaven. I frequently find him lost in iPhone bliss discovering all of its many functions, bells and whistles. The gift was definitely a hit!

6) Scott and his friend Chris, otherwise known as Killing Thursby, continue to spread the word about their EP release. Recently they have been able to send out inquiries to various music reviewers and have heard back from several that they are interested in having a Press Kit sent to them. In the music world industry, this is a big deal, and Scott is very excited that things are taking off.

7) We have enjoyed some testosterone-laden movie excursions, including: Wolverine, Star Trek, and Angels & Demons....all very good in their own ways. But Scott definitely owes me a period piece.

8) Scott and I completed the trainings to be Cabin Buddies at Camp Erin, and last Wednesday we were able to go to a pizza party that afforded our campers an opportunity to meet us and their fellow campers. I will have eight 11-13-year-old girls who were all very excitable and chatty about camp, while Scott will have six 9-10-year-old boys who are incredibly cute and rambunctious. He is preparing himself for a lot of physicality and farting, while I am preparing for a lot of gossiping and giggling.

9) This past weekend we were able to cash-in the last of our gift card to the 5th Avenue Theater, where we were able to enjoy an incredible performance of "Grease" by a traveling Broadway company. The singing, dancing, and staging was all amazing and we even got to see Taylor Hicks perform as the Teen Angel.....it was definitely a very fun, very concert-like vibe.

10) We found the BEST tiramisu EVER.....at Marzano's restaurant in Tacoma, WA. I don't even like coffee, but this recipe was simply divine....sigh!

In the end, we don't have cute little kiddos to blog about, so you have to settle for what the two of us have to offer....and all the excitement that has to offer is worth about one blog a month. So....hope you all enjoy!

Remembering Mom

Before my mother died, I did not understand grief the same way that I understand it now nearly five years after her death. When I considered the possibility of losing a family member, I assumed that I would be laid so low by my sadness and grief that I would be incapable of functioning. However, when you have a loss forced upon you, confronting you with the audacity of its reality, you have a choice - to give yourself over to the grief, or force open your eyes to the new day. The resiliency that I discovered, and that I observed each of my family members cling to in those first few days and weeks following Mom's death, was an impossibility that my untested mind had refused to conceive of...it was truly a miracle. As a family therapist, I have seen grief work itself in to the very fiber of people's existence, controlling every action they take, and shifting the tempo of their lives. In some cases, people become crippled by their loss, a rudderless ship set adrift on uncharted waters....and they wander. Some families experience a wash of relief, contented to allow their loved ones to pass on from this life...the slow ebbing of a life gently swathing the family in grief.

My mother was a beautiful person. On this Mother's Day, I want to pay tribute to her "humanness", and not the "saintliness" of her. When someone we love dies I think there is a tendency for our minds to shade our memories, leaving only the brightest, sunniest memories of that person - in a word, we sometimes elevate them to a saintly status. What I appreciate about my mother, is not what sets her apart from everyone else, but that which allows me to have a chance to be as good as, as kind as, and as loving as my mother. And I am grateful to her for her flaws, because through her efforts to improve herself she garnered my respect and my admiration. My mother did not aspire to much more than being a good mother and a good person, and beyond that, to know her Savior intimately. So, I give you my Top 25 things about my Mom that made her an extraordinary human being:

25) Mom always spoke with proper diction and animation, often punctuating her statements with hand gestures and facial expressions.

24) Mom was a consummate story teller - I learned to love my ancestors through the stories told at my bedside of girls singing "Oranges, Oranges, Two for a Penny" over the church pulpit; three brothers who shared one pair of shoes because they were too poor to afford any more, taking turns wearing them in to a dance while the other two brothers waited their turn outside; or the drunk Indian who chased a young Minerva in to town on horseback.

23) Mom loved to TALK, often dominating the conversation with captivating stories and ancedotes. She could often be found on the phone talking to family, on the sidewalk chatting with neighbors, and sitting in the lobby at church several minutes after the meetings were over to talk with friends.

22) Mom was an amazing friend - yes, she loved to talk to people, and she could often be found talking to them, but the truth is, they sought her out. People flocked to my mom, sharing their sorrows and burdens with her, and she took some of their pain on herself.

21) Mom loved flowers - she would spend hours beautifying her garden. She took pride in the fact that her lawn was edged, her plots were ordered and weeded, and she designed patches of color-coded and symmetrical flower groupings.

20) Mom loved to fill our home with and expose us to beauty in all of its forms - music, art, drama - and she was gifted at all of them. I remember Mom dragging an unwilling Sara and Matt to a production of the Seattle symphony and driving us every Saturday to the Tacoma Youth Symphony practice so that we could participate with other young musicians. Piano lessons were forced, but in Mom's wisdom she told me I could quit when I was in high school, all the while knowing that I would be good enough at that point that I wouldn't want to quit.

19) Mom didn't let us eat processed foods - partially because she didn't think they were good for us, and partially because it was cheaper to make homemade treats. Warm chocolate chip cookies placed in foil were regular attendees of our lunches - their warm, pliable shapes molded in to and shaped by the foil.

18) Mom made me help her cook dinner, from a young age, almost every night. I used to grudgingly stomp in to the kitchen, angry that my rest time was interrupted. And yet, I can thank my daily cooking "lessons" to my ability to put dinner on the table now, and take risks in the kitchen because I'm confident in my skills.

17) My mom knew how to budget....she cooked healthy meals for six kids every night....we never ate a meal without a vegetable. And to this day, I cannot eat casseroles.

16) Mom was an amazing actress. She had a passion for theater and for drama and when I was young she helped to direct an amazing production of the Music Man in our community. Mom also knew how to do stage makeup and every year us kids had the most intricate, creative, and realistic makeup to accompany our Halloween costumes.

15) My mom had a beautiful singing voice, even if she wouldn't admit it. Mom could hold her own with the classics, but she really let herself "loose" when she sang her favorite, "I Dig Rock 'n' Roll Music" from The Mamas and the Papas.

14) Mom both loved and hated helping with school projects. She was not appreciative that her six children frequently "surprised" her with news that they had a project due on short notice, but her amazing creativity was usually the reason for high grades. Mom essentially helped me win a poster contest about healthy eating with her detailed drawings of fruits and vegetables - I'm still not sure how the judges believed that an 8-year-old had created such a 'masterpiece'.

13) Mom loved her ancestry and she was incredibly proud of the legacy left by her grandmother Minerva Teichert, famed artist. Shortly before her death, Mom had begun to tour throughout the stake giving lectures about her famous grandmother's art, requiring all in attendance to wear a fabulous hat to represent the era in which Minerva lived.

12) My mom loved her babies. She was incredibly gentle and loving with them, often speaking what seemed like a private language with her infants; and they loved her back, lighting up with happiness when they spotted her. "Lovey-dovey-doozy!"

11) Mom was empathetic to a fault, often declining to see a movie she deemed 'sad' as she was loathe to take on the pain of fictional characters, and yet she never shied from assuming that weight with her children or her friends, even perfect strangers. Mom allowed people a respite from their troubles while they spent time in her presence.

10) Mom was extremely proper - my sister and I were not allowed to attend church without wearing nylons, a slip under our skirts, and we were taught to sit with our ankles crossed. We learned table etiquette from an early age and we were expected to open doors for people, express gratitude, and generally conduct ourselves with decorum.

9) My mother was, for the most part, spectacularly unathletic, and yet she was an amazing cheerleader, championing her children from the sidelines with an enthusiasm I imagine was difficult to muster after several soccer games in freezing rain.

8) Mom could tickle the ivories in a way that often made me jealous - she knew how to improvise and could sit downstairs playing the piano and singing - transporting herself to WWII Austria, the beaches of the South Pacific, and the decorated cabins of the Showboat.

7) Mom was fiercely proud of her children, believing more fully than they did in their capability. Mom pushed me to run for ASB President, made posters and banners to advertise my name, helped me write my speech, took me to Kinko's late at night to make campaign handouts, and was the least surprised of any of us when I won.

6) My mom often sacrificed, like most moms, so that her children could have what they needed. And yet she loved to look nice and dress up. I remember on the few occasions that my mom had to truly dress up, like a New Year's Eve dance, she went all out, and she was so incredibly luminous. But I remember my mom's beauty on the days when she wasn't going out, and I found her to be just as beautiful.

5) Mom loved music - I remember as a teenager I was so frustrated that the strains of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir would cajole me awake every Sunday morning; yet I remember thrilling to the pulsing chorus from Handel's Messiah filling our living room every Christmas Eve while we sang along with the words: "Wonderful, Counselor, the Mighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace."

4) Mom seemed to constantly get called to lead the ward choirs, but she didn't do anything 'half way'. I remember her paying my sister and I to call members of the ward to remind them of choir practice - 5 cents for every phone call. That same choir practice found me at the church building providing babysitting for the children of the parents who were in the choir. I recall playing as the choir accompanist for my mom during high school. And finally, I remember the beauty of her two choirs, one from Puyallup, and one from Federal Way, singing at her funeral.

3) My mom often admitted that all she ever wanted to be was a mother. A year or so after her death, my sister Katie found a single entry written by my mom in a journal - a portent of sorts - in which she wrote that she often worried she would be taken before she was able to raise her children. Mom explained that she was often 'not feeling well' and suspected that she was not meant for this life to any great extent of time, but she prayed frequently that she would be allowed to raise all of her children to the point that the Lord needed her in that role. I have often wondered at those words, and at the wisdom and acceptance my mother had toward God's plan for her.

2) My mom loved the Lord. I recall that she was often the instigator calling the family to family prayer each night, young children gathered in a circle in the hallway. Mom could often be found in her room reading her scriptures, and if you passed her room late in evening she was often kneeling next to her bed speaking with her Heavenly Father. Mom found great satisfaction and fulfillment in teaching seminary and learned to truly love teaching others to spark a passion for scripture reading. Mom knew gratitude and was thankful to the Lord for all that He made possible in her life - she had come to recognize her own weaknesses - and had allowed the Lord's hand to direct her life. I am confident that my mom had a relationship with the Lord to the point that she could call Him "friend".

1) My mom was flawed but she was exceptional.

As for me, I am sad every time I think about her; it burns behind my eyes and constricts my throat, squeezing drops out of the corners of my eyes - it happens without my permission. I miss her every single day, but I am content to know that my mom was a flawed human being just like me, but she was my saint.

Killing Thursby (the rebirth of Mosaic)

Many of you already know about Scott's new album if you have a facebook account, but I'm so proud of him, I just had to add a post to our blog. Scott and his best friend, Chris Chappel, with whom he has been making sweet music since highschool, have just released an EP of 5 songs. Scott and Christ formerly collaborated under the name of Mosaic throughout the early 20s, releasing a few albums and performing around Seattle and LA. Now Scott and Chris live on two different ends of the West coast, but have found a way to "meet their minds" through the virtual power of the internet. This album has been a long time coming, including several years added to their ages, a few more grey hairs, months of collaboration, a change of band name, and light years of advancement in technology and promotional possibilities. The process has not been without its stressors, but Scott and Chris have much to be proud of.....you should give them a listen, buy the album, and add yourself to the mailing list:

http://www.killingthursby.com/

Lobster & Candlelight? NO!.....Lobster & Canning

When Scott and I moved back in May, we reconnected with a family from my years in Federal Way - the Kays. Glenna Kay was my mom's good friend and the best way that I can describe her is practical, pragmatic, and powerful - Glenna is a force to be reckoned with. She heads a committee for our church that encourages the members to prepare for emergencies and disasters with practical advice, including storing at least 72 hours worth of food, extra clothing, being aware of shutting off utilities, knowing how to stay in contact with loved ones, having an exit strategy, etc. Needless to say, Glenna is the perfect person for this kind of job because she won't take "no" for an answer. Since I see her every Sunday at church I am regularly accosted, um, I mean "encouraged" to get myself and my family prepared. Glenna has been urging me to sign-up to go to the cannery in Kent todo some canning. For those of you not familiar, the cannery is a church-owned facility where you can do both dry-and wet-pack canning of essentials in the event of an emergency. Not only does she want me to go to the cannery, she wants me to buy a mill to grind my own wheat (it's only $192), and organize my home in such a way that I can keep my canning out of the elements (i.e., not in the garage). Since I tend to operate off of two main motivators: logic and guilt, I could both reason the need to do it for practical reasons, and the tugging of my conscience to get off my hiney and get prepared. So I signed us up fo canning and I gave Scott and a 6 week lead-time so that he could mentally prepare himself for three hours at the cannery. And then this last Friday night, we realized the end of a "dream" and canned us some black beans, wheat, rice, sugar, and nonfat dry milk. I had to put my foot down with Glenna about how much I was willing to order, and promise to do more next month. Here are a Top 5 list of things we learned about Emergency Preparedness at the cannery on Friday:

5) We need to do it, and do it well.

4) It takes a concerted effort to prepare your self with a three month supply.

3) Having to wear a hair net is not flattering for anyone.

2) Dry-pack canning is amazingly low-tech.

1) Working at the cannery with fellow members is actually quite fun.

After all the fun at the cannery, covered in dust from the products, we enjoyed a dinner Lobster Fest at Red Lobster. We felt it was a fitting end to a glamorous look and a glamorous night.

CAMP ERIN

Scott and I are super excited because we will both be volunteering at a camp for kids who are grieving. Camp Erin is a 3-day camp experience, free of charge to its participants, and is facilitated by professional staff and trained volunteers of BRIDGES. The camp is for children ages 6-17 who have experienced the death of a loved one. Camp Erin is a high energy, fun camp with grief support and education woven in. Adult “Big Buddy” volunteers offer additional support and companionship for campers. Camp Erin will be held at Camp Seymour, located 22 miles west of Tacoma. All campers will have the option to enjoy varied camp activities. These activities include:
Swimming
Boating
Arts and Crafts
Music
Drama
Evening Campfires
Outdoor Games
Wall Climbing
Archery
Scott and I will both be Big Buddies and we couldn't be more pumped to be involved in such an awesome volunteer experience, although we both plan to bawl our eyes out. If you know of anyone in the Tacoma/Seattle area who could benefit from participating, please let me know.

If you want to see a very cool video with testimonials, check out the link below:

http://www.moyerfoundation.org/img/videos/2007CampErinTestimonials.wmv

Fun with family....

We haven't posted anything in a while because to be honest, we have been overwhelmingly busy. I was fortunate, however, to go down to Provo the first weekend of March to visit with my sister Katie and her family, and as an added bonus, visit with Daniel and Kristi and Joel. The true purpose of the trip was to celebrate my nephew's and niece's birthdays, and to help my sister with the birthday party she had planned for a Mallory and seven of her four-year-old friends. With the best of intentions, I think my sister went overboard with the kiddy-prizes for her Princess and Princes-themed party: swords for the boys, wands for the girls, crowns for the all of the kids, prince and prince-themed prizes for each game, candy from the 'dragon' we 'slayed, candy from the 'dragon eggs' we 'recovered' from the the 'dragons lair', 'treasure' from the 'treasure hunt', etc. Each kid left that party toting two giant bags full of crap (I mean wonderful prizes).

Prior to the party I helped Katie prepare by decorating, cleaning, picking up a beautiful cake, and painting Mallory's toenails princess-pink. Amidst all of the hubbub I was able to reconnect with my niece and nephew - Elliot is now talking up a storm, and Mallory is as precocious as ever. And I checked in by phone with Scott every night - sharing my amazement at my sister's patience and energy to deal with the almost constant whining prompted by the kids being sick. Elliot, who was congested and coughing, would literally work himself in to a fit each night, and nearly every time he ate - coughing, hacking, and crying - and then he would throw up. In one day, I believe my sister cleaned-up three different vomiting events - one of those occasions occurred in the crib and also involved a removed diaper and poop (I'll leave that to your imagination). Needless to say, when I was painting Mallory's toes, and she was writhing around on the counter, trying to grab things, and moving her feet, I felt a surge of frustration and anger when she knocked the nail polish remover off the counter - I told Scott later, I almost lost it on her, but by some miracle was able to take a deep breath and control what I said. If nothing else, this trip made me question what type of parent I might be, under pressure, tired, and trying to put together a memorable experience for my child - in all honesty, I have my doubts. But I left my sister's home with a renewed sense of respect for what she does each day.

Elliot's Birthday:

Joel helped us get ready for the party and endured the back seat; Elliot was sick the day of his birthday and rather non-plussed by his gifts. Mallory had to help him get in the spirit of unwrapping before he found his groove.

Mallory's Birthday:

Everthing looked so loverly pre-party, but after the whirlwind that IS seven four-year-olds, Katie's house was a wreck. But, they sure did have fun, and Mallory felt like a true princess!

And finally, I was able to enjoy a little Barbeque with my brother Daniel, his wife, Kristi, and my brother Joel - we checked-out another Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives spot in Salt Lake called Pat's. Let's be honest, it was not as good as Gorilla's, in Pacifica, but we didn't have to wait for 2 hours, so that was a bonus.

The Trifecta: San Fran Pictures

Foodie Fun in San Fran: the Trifecta

So, in case you didn't recognize from our last post, Scott and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary on the 14th, Valentine's Day. Many of you men will notice, with jealousy, that Scott is able to tick-off two of the major holidays largely agreed upon by women to be "very romantically important". But wait....my birthday is also the very next day, February 15th....and so, the Trifecta of major holidays all in one weekend. Now I must add a disclaimer, we did NOT get married on Valentine's because we are sappy romantics - at the time, I was teaching school and happened to have a week-long break that started with Valentine's Day and we had to be practical! However, it is what it is....and now we have the Trifecta-effect. I recently said to Scott that I need a "distinct" day for my Birthday - sometimes I feel like I was born in December and my birthday gets overshadowed by Christmas. But....I digress! I'm not complaining in the least, rather, I recognize that I got to feel special, loved, honored, pampered for an entire weekend, and I loved every second of it!

This year, to mark five years of marriage, we decided to take a little trip to San Francisco - what began as a "get away" to a fun destination, ended as an unintended, overindulgent Foodie adventure of the most ridiculous kind, i.e., we were uncomfortably full the entire trip. Due to the fact that we were trying to squeeze-in a number of highly rated restaurants in the three days we "breezed" through California. And, oh yes, we were able to squeeze-in a few sight-seeing excursions as well, such as: Pacific Coast Highway, San Francisco Ghost Hunt, Fisherman's Wharf, etc. The "highlight" of those sight-seeing adventures occurred on a day that made national news on CNN for a severe-weather warning, my birthday, February 15th. We boarded the cruiser to take us to Alcatraz Island in not-quite torrential rain, but wholly underprepared for the weather: in sweaters, jeans, thin cotton scarves, and one umbrella. The boat rocked and rolled its 15-minute trip to the island and the rain worsened, pelting down on us as we disembarked and climbed a series of switch backs to reach The Rock. In the freezing rain we explored the "streets" of the penitentiary and I felt growing sorrow for the men who passed their lonely sentence in those despicably small, cold cells. Then, drenched, shivering, and somewhat seasick, we finished our walk down the Embarcadero and....bought another umbrella.
Feb.13- Lunch: Chaat Cafe, Fremont, CA
Dinner: Six-course menu at Masa's, San Francisco
Feb.14- Breatkfast: Dynamo Doughnuts, San Francisco
Lunch: Gorilla Barbeque, Pacifica, CA (we found this amazing place on the Food Network Channel - Guy Fieri's Diners, Drive-in, and Dives; we waited 2 hours to order and receive our food, but it was definitely worth it)
Dinner: Roy's Hawaiian Fusion, San Franciscso
Feb.15- Breakfast: Left over Dynamo Doughnuts
Snack: Ciao Bella Gelateria, San Francisco
Snack: Ghirardelli's Ice Cream Parlor, San Francisco
Dinner: The Stinking Rose, San Francisco (a fun restaurant where everything is cooked with garlic; we even ate the garlic ice cream at the end of our meal)
Snack: Gelateria Naia, San Francisco

Did I mention that we ate a lot? We are definitely fans of food, and we were well-fed on this trip.

A Pictorial Tribute to Our 5th Wedding Anniversary: February 14, 2004

We Are Mass-Media "Tools"

It occurred to me the other day that as much as Scott and I pride ourselves on our shopping restraint, a high-minded sense of making informed, conscientious decisions about what we purchase and why, we are often "sucked-in" to the vast black hole that is infomercials. The exciting descriptions of new products intended to shave minutes off your morning routine, decrease your battle with mundane house chores, or simply change the way you see yourself in the mirror, are all intended to persuade you to shell out your hard-earned cash. But personally, I think it is the testimonials - whether it is an astounding before and after picture of incredible weight loss, a weepy woman describing how make-up gave her the confidence to get a job teaching, or the miraculous number of meals one can create with the shilled kitchen device - I am hooked.

Exhibit A: The first time I saw a commercial for the Snuggie, I laughed so hard I cried - I went running up the stairs calling to Scott to come and look at the television. I think it must have been the family of three sitting in the bleachers dressed like recently-escaped-from-the-monastery-monks in burgundy habits, cheering-on their son/brother while he played soccer that initially sent me in to hysterics. And yet, while Scott and I shopped at Walgreens the other day, we passed a display of the infamous "the blanket that has sleeves," we looked at each other, shrugged, and threw one in the cart. One can only mock so long before one must admit to the numerous practical uses for such an invention - fashion-forward it is not, but it is a warm alternative to a cold night.

Exhibit B: One of the great mysteries of television infomercials is why the makers of The Magic Bullet felt it was necessary to use paid actors to peddle their wares rather than to let the product speak for itself through the real-life user endorsements. Nooooo....instead they felt it was necessary to have set the infomercial in a fake kitchen, apparently one in which any old "boozy" neighbor, or "crotchety old" biddy, are welcome to waltz into whenever it strikes their fancy. And yet....for all its ridiculousness, I found myself curious about the myriad options for how I could use it, and so I bought one.

Exhibit C: Scott and I typically enjoy going to the Puyallup Fair just to "be there" and soak-in the excitement and action. On principal, we make a sojourn to the product areas, reminiscent of when farmers would bring their produce to sell at the county fair, not necessarily to buy anything but because it's fun to see what's being hawked. This last fall, in we went, and out we came with Sham Wow! - the German "wonder" towel. And while its powers were undeniably attractive - soaking up an entire can of soda out of a swatch of carpeting - I think we may have been caught up in the moment.

Exhibits D, E, F and G: Over the course of the years, Scott and I have succumbed to the cunning enticements of various infomercial pronunciations, including: Dermacia, a type of makeup with "amazing coverage" that also "breathes"; Sheer Cover, a mineral makeup "pimped" by Leeza Gibbons; The Firm, an exercise program involving a combination of step aerobics and weights created by a cohort of women in the Deep South - gotta love an instructor calling out the step with an accent: "Hey, ya'all take a look at thowse guuuns". For a highly entertaining event, you should see Scott and I doing these videos together; and Green Tea Patches, intended to accelerate your weight loss efforts.

Some of these purchases have been absolutely ridiculous and some have been very helpful, but the bottom line is that they are entertaining. Recently I saw the most AWESOME infomercial for a workout video, which I am now begging Scott to buy me for my birthday: the official Dirty Dancing Workout video.

Entertaining? Fo sho...... Helpful? That remains to be seen...... If you want to see a few clips from this AMAZING video see attached: http://dirtydancingworkout.com/ Maybe once we are dancing like Jonny and Baby we will post our own video....stay posted.

25 "Things" About Me

I am going to be extremely redundant, because I already posted these 25 "things" on Facebook, so for those of you who don't have a Facebook account, enjoy:

1) I am inherently suspicious of sharing things about myself....like it might come back to bite me in the butt!
2) I met Scott, my husband, when we lived as next door neighbors and ironically had an email address at the time: neighborgirl3713.
3) Starting in the 8th grade, I have sprained and/or fractured my ankles at least 10 times. The most ridiculous was when I stepped on a pinecone = fracture; the most recent was stepping on the edge of a manhole = sprain.
4) I hate snakes, rats, and spiders - when I see them I want to stab them in their faces!
5) While serving as a missionary in Argentina, my companion and I, Laura Schiess (Astle), were mugged in broad daylight - we lost our money, our books, our bags, and our dignity - the perpetrators didn't even have guns.
6) When I was in junior high I thought I wanted to be a prime time News Anchor until I did a 3-day stint at the local news channel and hated every minute of it.
7) Excluding pre-college years, I have never lived in the same house/apartment for more than two years at a stretch - I get restless very easily.
8) The place I would most like to visit is Greece.
9) I am almost obscenely curious about Regency England - think Jane Austen - and the role of women in the society, especially how conduct literature was utilized in the class/gender structure.
10) I wrote a series of papers in college on the influence of the Amazons in Greek mythology on the modern feminist movement; it was very difficult to find research materials in the BYU library.
11) My hair is my "safety blanket", so to speak - aside from one slight misjudgment in letting a friend cut my hair in the 8th grade, I have never had hair shorter than my shoulders.
12) My dream would be to have the kind of singing voice that could handle a Duettino Sull Aria from the Marriage of Figaro (think Shawshank Redemption).
13) Although I play the piano, I have to work at it, and in order to accompany someone like my husband when he sings, I have to practice, practice, practice.
14) I was hired once to play at someone's wedding: the Wedding March, the Recessional, and to accompany a vocalist on the cheesiest wedding song ever titled, "Longer" - then the bride stiffed me.
15) In 4-6th grades I took private cello lessons from Lance Johnson, who I thought was really "hot" (he was 17), and I played in the Tacoma Junior Youth Symphony.
16) When I was two years in to my college experience, majoring in the Humanities, my parents and four younger siblings took a trip to Europe two weeks before I finished my finals - I was sooooo pissed!
17) I contracted a parasite while living in South America that has completely 'jacked' my intestinal "devices" and makes digestion a real "treat".
18) My first college roommate, Heather Rudy, was the daughter of my mom's best friend all growing up, who converted to the LDS faith while they were college students. Missy, Heather's mom, transferred colleges to attend BYU and she and my mom were college roommates for a few years. Heather and I had never met prior to being roommates, but we hit it off smashingly.
19) I worked as a secretary at the Women's Research Institute for 2.5 years while attending BYU, the only job at the 'Y' where you could be suspected of having feminist-sympathies.
20) While teaching Senior College English, at Sumner High School for two years, at least 5 seniors failed my class making them ineligible for graduation. I'm not on anyone's hit list, as far as I know.
21) I consider myself obsessed with anything "small" or "miniature": horses, dogs, especially monkeys - I have toyed with the idea of creating a "miniature zoo".
22) Currently half-time I work with juvenile offenders doing family therapy with them and their families, in their homes; I have seen kids arrested for: Domestic Violence, Prostitution, Assault with a Deadly Weapon, Residential Burglarly, Trespassing, Possession of a Controlled Substance, to name a few....
23) I used to consider marriage to be something that "other people" do, until I got married myself; now I consider having children something "other people" do....maybe I'll have to eat those words some day.
24) In high school I ran for ASB president against another kid from my church who had asked a boy from the junior class to be his campaign manager - so I asked that kid's girlfriend to be my campaign manager. Guess who won?
25) I plan to return to university within the next 5 years to pursue my PhD in Marriage and Family Therapy....in the mean time, I am working on writing and getting published in a scholarly publication.

Why Some Parents Suck: A Reflection on Therapy

I have restrained myself when it comes to writing about my job, because I don't want to give people the wrong impression - I really do love my job. But......today I need to vent. After working in both the teaching field and now in the therapy field, I suspect I should no longer be "shocked" by the amazingly horrible insight many parents possess (or should I say, the lack of insight) - that they do not often equate their own actions and behaviors with the actions and behaviors of their children; let it be said, however, that I still find myself AMAZED. And so I provide you with a top 10 list of parental stupidity - and let me remind you that I actually do work with many amazing families and will provide a top 10 list of parental awesomeness in a later post (all names have been changed for privacy and HIPAA's sake):

10) Parent to me in a recent session, whilst child was sitting in the next chair over: "If Jonny would just stop throwing tantrums our family could have fun again."

9) Child in foster care is waiting in the lobby with her foster parent for her biological mother to arrive for our session (court-ordered, mind you) - with face pressed against the glass, watching. Mom never did show.

8) Young Gavin is explaining that his dad frequently yells at him and his brother during their bi-weekly visits and he doesn't like it when his dad yells. Sara: "What do you do when Anger bothers you and your dad and makes him yell?" Gavin: "I hide in the closet."

7) Paternal aunt, who has custody of young James, is taking her custody battle with James' father to court. Aunt clearly loves James, but is incapable of allowing the course of therapy to flow naturally. Dad, by the way, has made huge changes and is a "fit" parent. James to me: "Dad makes me scared." Sara: "How does he do that?" James: "I don't know..." Sara: "Do you have someone to talk to when Worry gets too big?" James: "I talk to mom (aunt)." Sara: "Did you talk to her when dad made you scared?" James: "Yes" Sara: "What did she say?" James: "I can't remember what she told me to tell you...." Hmmmmm...

6) An angry dad says to me: "I read through your session notes with my son, and all you talk about is what my ex-wife says, I started to wonder if you knew her from before, like she was your friend and that's why she brought Tyson to see you." "Ummm, no," I replied, "that would be unethical of me." Dad: "Well, I'm gonna have to ask my lawyer to strike all of your notes." Honestly, be my guest....

5) Meth-user mom in her drug-induced state, allowed numerous tweakers free reign in her home. My client, the oldest of her 6 children, all from different men, warned her mom that she felt like the house was likely being watched by the police; mom did nothing to change her ways. Now mom is in prison for 24-months on drug-related charges, and all 6 kids are with her mother. Delaney tells me that mom frequently "blames" her for her current situation saying, "You should have tried harder to convince me that the house was being watched - it's your fault I'm in jail."

4) Thirteen year-old-Amanda, during our second session, begins to cry uncontrollably and sputters out, "It's my fault that my parents got divorced."

3) Brenna, who was raped by a drug-pusher who drunken mom allowed in to the house, was told by mom: "I don't believe you, Brenna, you're such a liar. Go back to bed."

2) Angela, age nine, tells me: "I don't ever want to see my mom again, or talk to her - if she calls I'm just going to say 'hi' and 'bye'." Sara: "Why?" Angela: "Because she hurt me - she beat me with a belt and a wooden paddle." This same child drew a picture to show me what Dad had done to "hurt" the family, because she was too embarrassed to tell me - this picture depicted Dad choking Mom.

1) Allison, age 16, tells me that after her parents split she decided to go live at Dad's house. Dad allowed Allison to use drugs, including ecstasy. He proceeded to "sell" Allison while she was in an altered state, allowing numerous men to take advantage of her. Allison, who survived the ordeal, now sees no reason to have relationships, not with men, women, or her own mother.

I don't share these atrocious stories to make you all "sick", but rather to reaffirm the strength of the human spirit and the resiliency of children. I am extremely grateful for my faith and for the power of prayer, which sustain me when I am just plain "sad" for the lives many of my clients must live, daily:

[God says], do not fear, for I am with you;do not be dismayed, for I am your God.I will strengthen you and help you;I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. - Isaiah 41:10

What is my purpose in life, what is my responsibility?

Whether I like it or not, I am on this planet

and it is far better to do something for humanity.

So you see that compassion is the seed or basis.

If we take care to foster compassion,

we will see that it brings the other good human qualities.

The topic of compassion is not at all religious business;

it is very important to know that it is human business

that it is a question of human survival

that is not a question of human luxury....

It is clear that even without religion we can manage.

However, without these basic human qualities we cannot survive.

It is a question of our own peace and mental stability. - The Dalai Lama

H-O-L-L-A! A Shout Out to my Hubby

I am increasingly amazed by the fact that my husband, Scott, fills each of his various roles with such aplomb, despite the fact that they are all increasingly wearing on his time and energy. Therefore, I have decided that he needs an entire posting dedicated to his awesomeness.

Husband:

As our 5th wedding anniversary rapidly approaches, Scott and I have had several opportunities to reminisce about the series of oddly-related circumstances that brought us together (which I will save for a later post). For the purposes of this blog, I want to expound on only one of those cirucumstances: that when Scott and I met he was a mere 8 months post-operative on his brain tumour. This is a fact that we have mutually agreed did not lend itself to the most physically-fit, nor physically attractive stage of Scott's lifetime - he was doughy, pasty, and what we refer to lovingly as a "cave fish" - bottom line, he was not healthy. I didn't really want anything to do with him, not because of the health issues, but because I knew that the wheedling biddies in our ward would attempt to "push" us together. Scott, with all of his cunning savvy did not wait for their "help" and caught me off-guard and unprepared with an excuse to avoid his first invitation to do something together. What I found out that first evening was that none of my posturing about being "sick of dating" or effusive sarcasm could put him off - he was nothing if not patient and gracious as he listened to me ramble on and on. I congratulated myself about getting through the date and planned my escape in to the house, but again, Scott caught me off-guard on the porch by asking me out for the next night. Drat! I had no ready excuse and so I found myself out to dinner with the 'boy next door', once again, talking and ruminating about hopeless and pathetic roommates. And so the pattern continued, I resolved to be 'done' with Scott, and he persisted in asking....soon I discovered that I genuinely liked spending time with my "cave fish". Scott proved himself to be gracious, entertaining, wickedly smart, able to talk about any subject, inquisitive, guileless, genuine, gentle, and he listened....I mean he really cared about what I said. I found myself intrigued, then drawn to his presence, and finally, GASP, in love. I am grateful to Scott for proving to me that love was not just for "other people".

Massage Therapist:

If you see what I see, you see a slab of fleshy-flesh....not something I would want to touch. If you see what Scott sees, you see a maze of muscles and ligaments tight with tension that yearn for the right pressure and touch so that they "melt" and the client is afforded some relief. I could not do what Scott does every day, and yet he brings people rest and relaxation. Rightly so, many of his clients have promised their "first born" if he will only run away with them and become their personal massage therapist (that's right, 'masseuse' is not an appropriate title - think Thailand, and you will know what I mean). Anyway, although tempted, he has not succumbed to any client's nefarious offers, for which I am grateful. Instead, he consistently brings relief to clients who have just lost a spouse, are recovering from a grave illness, or just need a break from life. No matter how smelly, talkative, or crazy they are, they are treated with respect; and that's why they keep coming back for more.

Student:

Many of you know that Scott recently returned to school, and after an arduous struggle to decide what he would study, Scott decided on respiratory therapy. Truth be told, Scott would love to study music, and in a different time and place, you would have seen Scott perform on the most heralded stages in the most prestigious performance halls around the world. But what distinguishes Scott even more than his amazing musical talents, is his willingness to sacrifice for his future family. After much discussion and consideration, Scott is pursuing a career that will still allow him to serve people in need, while earning our family more money, and providing him a more consistent schedule. Scott currently gets up every morning at 6:00 am and leaves our home by 7:00, afterwhich he commutes for an hour to PIMA where he attends class for 4 hours. He follows this class time with work, often not returning home until another hour-long commute at 9:00, and then he repeats the whole process again the next day. I love him for his sacrifice and his diligence.

Musician:

Scott and his best friend, Chris Chappel, formed a group back in high school named Mosaic - as part of this experience they released two compact discs and performed at various locales around home and in the Los Angeles area (I'm their number one fan - and I have the T-shirt to prove it). Recently Scott and Chris "are getting the band back together" and it will be the new, and improved version: Mosaic 2.0. However, they are renaming the group, and not Prince-style with the symbol, instead they will relaunch at the end of this month as "Killing Thursby". Not only has Scott impressed legions of fans with his amazing ability to "tickle the ivories" but his vocals, too, have blessed the lives of many people. I marvel at his gift to write moving and intriguing lyrics - all of the lyrics on their new album were written by Scott. I am overjoyed that Scott and Chris have rediscovered their muse and want to make sweet, sweet music again. They are an incomparable fusion of talent.

Bottom line - I'm grateful to share life's journey with my husband, Scott!

Cuckoo for CTR: A Farewell

When Scott and I moved in to our current ward back in May, I was excited for the "fresh start" and the opportunity to meet new people. In all honesty, I was actually excited to receive a new calling - I always look forward to the anticipation and excitement of finding out what the bishop feels we either "need" to do, or where we might be "needed". But I must also confess that I have often struggled over the years to understand the callings I receive and how I might "need" a calling or why I am "needed". In all honesty, it is my pride that often gets in the way of truly accepting the calling on its base merit, but instead questioning, always questioning. In an irony that doesn't escape me, I always seem to be asked to fulfill a calling that requires me to do something eerily similar to my professional job. For example, when Scott and I first started dating, I had just started teaching, we were called to teach a primary class full of munchkin-terrorists. After we were married, despite my telling the Bishop that I had previously served in several "teaching-type" callings, a month later I found myself teaching the teenage-Sunday-school class. And at BYU, after I purposely left my piano skills off of my "personal information" forms, I was called to play the piano in my wards the first three years of my college experience.

So it should come as no surprise that when Scott and I were asked to co-teach the CTR 5 primary class, I was, well, kind of disappointed. I work as a family and children's therapist and found the prospect of not just working with troubled kids 5 days a week, now I was going to work with "troubled" kids 7 days a week (yes, I'm calling 4-year-olds "troubled"). My reluctance was compounded by the fact that Scott works on Sundays and I knew I would be corralling a class of 8-10 kids on my own. I will admit that Scott and I wearily faced the prospect of making pom-pom pets for a lesson on Loving Animals, or glueing and stapling Truth Glasses, on Saturday nights. Equally daunting was knowing that nearly my entire class would declare that they needed to "go potty" at least once during our class. Needless to say, I didn't always "like" what I was doing on Sunday...it sometimes felt like I was running a Christian daycare. But over time their cherubic faces, and hilarious statements wore me down and I had to admit to myself that I had grown to love my "kids". So I give you my top-ten moments from the Fruitland Ward Primary's CTR 5 class:

10) Little William pulling on my skirt and handing me a cheap plastic-jewel earring worn by a fellow classmate: "Teacher, she lost part of her costume." (Not quite sure when we started wearing "costumes" to church).

9) Sean, child of a recent convert, taking the much labored-over Truth Glasses as they were passed out in order to be colored. When I turned around and saw he was not working on coloring I asked where his glasses were and he said matter-of-factly: "I dropped them out the window."

8) Sean, while trying to draw the attention of his classmates, robot-voice-repeating: "Pee-pee, poo-poo," while foaming at the mouth.

7) Scott, on a rare day of being able to help in the class, tried to hustle the kids through finishing up their coloring on a project. William whined, "I'm not done yet," to which Scott replied pointedly, "Well, maybe if you hadn't spent so much time building a sword with your markers, you could have finished earlier." William promptly burst into tears. (Nice touch, right?)

6) Jenny, a frequent vistor to her grandma who lives in the ward, showed-up to primary with lipstick smeared around her mouth, smudged blue eye shadow, and overwhelmingly POWERFUL cheap perfume and asks, "Do you like my make-up, my grandma did it?" "I love it," I replied.

5) Owen refusing to sing during Sharing Time, to which I struck upon an ingenious idea and I prompted him, "How about you sing the next song like Wall-E." I was blessed, the very next song to hear, "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus," in robot-kid-voice.

4) Owen saying to Scott, "Watch me, " and then falling off of his chair.

3) When asking the class why Jesus wouldn't just come back to earth in a perfect form, if He had the power to do so, Dylan replied without hesitation: "Because He wanted them to know it was Him." (So Smart!)

2) After giving the class child-sized CTR reminder bracelets and explaining that they are waterproof, Jessica breathlessly exclaims: "I'm never going to take it off."

1) Owen returned after a two-week family vacation and I reminded him during Sharing Time that he hadn't been in class for awhile and I had missed him. Later, in class while I was teaching the lesson, Owen raised his hand and queried, "Sara?" - "Yes, Owen?" - "I missed you." (You had me at "hello")

And so it is with some sadness I will be released from this calling in the next two weeks, and so I bid a fond adieu to my class:

Sorry, no pictures of Sean, William, Briah, or Jenny were "captured" while in their "natural habitat".

New Year's Eve Fun with Sara and Scott

It's a Holly-Jolly Christmas

Scott and I have decided that it's difficult to approximate the Christmas traditions of childhood when it's only the two of you - which makes for a rather stark, sometimes-odd, and unusually short Christmas morning. We definitely recognize that the "fun" of having children around this Christmas season was missed, however, it was still not enough of an excuse to drive us toward procreation.....or adoption.....yet.....sorry, family. Despite the lack of presents, Scott and I were able to find ways to invite the Christmas spirit in to our lives. Again this year, like last year, we adopted a family that wasn't able to provide presents for their children - two girls ages 6 and 8. We had little information to go on, other than that the older girl loved Hannah Montana and High School Musical; while the younger loved Disney Princesses. We had fun shopping for the girls, and despite my inherent general distaste for all things HM and HSM-related, I put my own feelings aside and went to work. Both girls got two cute outfits, one nicer, and one casual - Scott was a 'good sport' about shopping for girl-clothes, and generally deferred to my judgment. But we both scratched our heads when we got to the toy aisles - apparently it has been too long for me since I was a 6 or 8-year old girl, and never, for Scott - but we muddled through. We also got each girl a backpack, socks, hair accessories, and a toy; needless to say, we had a lot of fun, and we were so happy we could make a child's Christmas enjoyable.

For ourselves, we decided to keep things low-key. We enjoyed having Scott's family over to our place to celebrate Christmas Eve....another one of the three or four-yearly excuses for me to bust-out my culinary skills: ham, rolls, sweet potatoes, salad (a recipe we recreated from the Cheesecake Factory), and all the accumulated Christmas treats. Me, Scott, Scott's parents, and his sister, Jen, enjoyed reminiscing about Christmases past and sharing thoughts about the birth of Jesus Christ - it is unfortunate that we often have to wait until the Christmas season to verbally express our love for the Savior.

On Christmas morning, we woke up late - to be honest, sleeping in was a nice gift to ourselves. We exchanged a few simple gifts and then I surprised Scott with a mutually-beneficial gift: a Blu-Ray player. We spent a few hours testing out how it worked - we've never seen Sleeping Beauty look so amazing before. Finally, we joined Scott's family at their home, and opened a few more gifts. Scott's parents got us a few fun gifts, including gift cards to some of our most-frequented local restaurants.

Scott opens a few presents.

Sara displays a new kitchen gadget.
After a while, Christmas prep takes a toll on everyone. We did, however, enjoy the Christmas-dinner fiesta that Mom prepared for us, and our satisfied tummies jiggled with laughter as we watched Mr. Bean's Christmas, a Hinckley family tradition. It was a wonderful holiday!